There’s something about seeing my child disappointed that leaves me breathless.
Not the kind of disappointment that comes with not liking the dinner in front of them or not getting the candy in the store aisle as we walk by. Not even the kind when we’ve made plans to do something and counting down the days before plans fall through.
The kind of disappointment that comes when they work hard for something, put themselves out there and leave themselves vulnerable in the trying for something great. Then left with hands empty, seemingly looked over. Their hard work dismissed.
I see the pain of disappointment well up in eyes. And my mama heart wants to rush in, go to battle, right what I think has been wronged and fix it. I immediately want to send emails and make phone calls to give someone a piece of my mind, hoping it will cover the missing piece of their heart. I want to make the ache disappear and fill the hole left by giving it their all and getting nothing back.
But God…He stops me short and leans in with a breath that tells me the disappointment is a perfect opportunity for joy. For joy in me and in my child.
Not the giddy joy that dances wild at met expectations. Instead the joy that comes from
trusting in my Father’s arms that hold this child and that hold me. Knowing He has gone before us in this. Resting that He knew disappointment would come and still He thought it was best. Sitting with it, not trying to change or fix it, just letting the sting settle for a moment. Trusting it will subside, this too will pass and that just because it hurts, it doesn’t mean it’s wrong.
Not every disappointment has an answer. I may never get to know the why behind these things. Still my sweet Jesus, He leans in, pulls us close and with all His power and might lets us know, rest, sit and trust Him because He never lets us go.